Thursday, December 23, 2010

AKU BUKAN MAKSUM

Raut wajah biasanya mencerminkan perasaan

Bila kita sedih, muka kita muram

Bila happy, muka berseri2…

Kalau marah, muka merah

I mean….kita boley baca perasaan seseorang itu melalui air wajah yang boleh di lihat dgn mata kasar

Tapi memangla air wajah boley diihat dgn mata kasar…

Kalau hati?? Camner nak tengok?

Well, saya lain…

Say tak selalu zahirkan perasaan melalui riak muka yang pelbagai…most of the time

And yes…

Saya berasa sangat down dan tak bersemangat ketika ini…

Semenjak beberapa bulan yang lalu, to be exact

People and friends around me do not know how deep it was, and still is..

Because I never ever showed it….

I looked calm like as if nothing happened

But deep here

I feel lost

It’s better to feel lost in a fairy tale….

Tapi jangankan fairy tale, ni habuk pon tadak apa kes…



I do many things…have fun in my own way….and friends didn’t know what’s happening…

Baru semalam me and my friends hangout….

We met, we laughed and then we said goodbye as usual…

We do things macam biasa, like over and over again..

Tapi makin over and over again la makin sesaper pon takkan tau how I feel….

I’m a loser…

I never showed it…

Bukan sebab aku paksa diri aku untuk menyembunyikan…

But it’s natural…

Whenever im sad…..it will never be expressed…

Ahhhhh losernya……

Baik jadik Rapunzel….

Duduk atas menara sorang2…..takyah nak tgk alam sekeliling…takyah nak piki2 kasik sakit ati wat sakit pale otak…

God…

I’m lost….

Find me….

There’s one song that I love so much…

It says,

“so many years had gone by….always strong tried not to cry”

“never thought that I need anyone to comfort me in life”

“But I’m all made up today”

“My emotions overload……cos there is no hand to hold…..there’s no shoulder here to lean on”

“I’m walking all on my own”

Aku bukan maksum

Aku tidak terpelihara dari dosa seperti para anbiya’

Sbb kalau semua yang aku nak adalah dosa…

Dosa2 akan menimbun tak tau banyak mana..

Keep doing it, sampai nak mintak ampun pon rasa malu dengan Tuhan

Sebab lps tuh mesti buat lagi…

And I’m lost…

Benda2 camni la ekceli yang buat aku down….

And seperti dikecewakan…

But just like a lost people, he stucks himself in the jungle..

But mine is always be the jungle of lust

Cos when it comes to lust, I really can’t resist..

In fact, my only wish this upcoming year is always so sinful…

To Him I pray, and to Him I ask sumthing….but how can I begging and pleading to Him for “that”?

People say “don’t change me…I wont change if peep ask me to”

But sampai bila?

So just be ourselves??

I just being myself, and yeahhh…..it’s much comfortable

But being myself, in fact, is so sinful….

Lord I’m stuck

I’m lost…

I’m filthy…

Find me…

So I guess everybody has their own weakpoints

And their strength…

So do i…

Im not weak

Im strong …..

Live your own life..

And be fabulous….

Love it?? :p

(Like that better ke?? Hmmm….)

i alwalys pray...satu hari nnti akan ada cahaya at the end of the tunnel....

Till then..

Don’t ask, don’t tell…

Seeya!

Love,

FF

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